All right, I think you've had enough bitching from me about the shitty state the world is in; all this negativity is getting to me as well, and there's no sense endlessly wallowing in it. I'm long overdue for another self-improvement post, and what better way to do that than a spot of inner game?
You may remember that a little while ago,
I joined Cappy Cap's Forced Discipline and Regimen Month, during which one of my goals was to learn something about a subject I had no knowledge of. Well, I've found something that's a) interesting, b) useful and c) falsifiable via my own testing in daily life, so why not?
What I'm referring to is
Koanic Soul.
Now that I've figured out why I'm actually a
lot more comfortable doing outrageously silly things with people I consider my in-group as opposed to my out-group (you'd think it'd be the other way around, since you can just dump people from the out-group), coming across Koanic Soul as a system of inner game for natural introverts does sound quite interesting. The principles which it's based on are plausible by my own evaluation, and I can go out and test it on the lab ladies (whom I will say after a number of months of being my game target dummies, have warmed up to me considerably. I suppose it is easy mode because a) they are compartively starved for male attention and b) anyone with a smidgen of game will become compartively alpha in that setting...)
But the most important thing that it appears to be selling is the path to the generation of a solid core self-identity, getting you to answer yourself as to the question of "who am I?" I will admit that is a rather big plus point in my book - I suppose a good proportion of this blog, reading back on my previous entries from the start of this year, has been an education in who I am and who I was even over this short period of time.
When I first started learning game from reading Roosh/Roissy et al, I'll admit to feeling heavily uncomfortable with pick-up per se, and gravitated towards the Ironwood/Vox Day camp of game. Pretty early on, I realised that my moral code would not live up to me closing on a girl (and fuck anyone who says it's beta), and went ahead and learned game to deprogram my brainwashing regarding sexual reality and get my masculinity up to snuff from the whiny, cowardly schlobb I used to be and still am where I haven't picked up all my pieces.
So yes, game for self-improvement as opposed to adding to my notch count, then testing the precepts on a group of captive target dummies. Which is why stuff that cultivates inner game appeals to me.
So the basic idea behind Koanic Soul is that one crafts a number of Koans, small, simple mantras that you can repeat to reinforce yourself, almost like meditation. People already oftentimes use some form of these, Koanic says, such as "this will be easy", "everything is a learning experience" and "I'm the best". The problem, he points out, is that many of these are not a) realistic, b) in line with one's genetic hardware, c) conflict with one another, or suffer from numerous other problems and as such, Koan crafting needs to be done very carefully and Koans tweaked from time to time.
Clearly, this needs a lot of self-reflection and honesty with oneself. It'll be a good exercise, if nothing else. The link I've provided up top to Koanic's blog should have his videos on a number of the basic ideas; considering some of the similarities between us, I think I should be able to use his own Koans as a template to craft my own personalised set and see where those get me.
More to come on this as events progress.